Monday, September 8, 2008

Bai Jai Bei



To welcome and bless new life there is a tradition in Northern China called the Bai Jai Bei or 100 Good Wishes Quilt. The practice asks friends and family to send two pieces of fabric, any color or pattern that is meaningful to that person. One square is used for placement in a quilt to warm and protect the new baby. A smaller piece is kept with a wish or blessing for the child's life.

I am very blessed and thankful to have received so many beautiful and unique pieces of fabric and truly heartfelt wishes during the making of Aubrey's quilt. Thanks to all of you who were able to contribute. The quilt turned out beautifully despite my not having ventured into Singer territory since grade school Four-H! I don't think I could have managed without Mom's help getting me started. Aubrey's Bai Jai Bei is bright and cheerful, at the ready to warm her for years to come, and infuse her with all of your loving wishes.



Second Sign

When discussing adoption, Dave and I never considered any other country than China. We both felt strongly that we could really help the life of one child, and since the goal was a little girl, China was the obvious choice. The next step would be to find an adoption agency. Having no experience in this area, Dave and I decided to use an agency out of Chicago. Friends had successfully used this agency twice so it seemed like a good bet. I filled out the application and sent it in.

I don't remember staff from the adoption agency contacting me personally, what I remember was receiving a packet in the mail with written instructions for compiling a dossier. I was lost. There were so many steps and different required pieces of information. It was overwhelming. The easiest task on the list was to contact a social worker and begin the home study process.

It would be several weeks before our social worker, Fran, could come by to see our house and meet myself, Dave and the boys. In the meantime I decided to tackle the background checks. Off to the Mishawaka Police Station. I presented the clerk with my form letter that needed completing. While waiting for the computer check to verify that I had no criminal behavior, I noticed a small clipping taped to the wall opposite the clerks window. On the scrap was typed a message I felt was placed there just for me. A Chinese Proverb.

Our social worker arrived at the appointed time. She looked through our home, interviewed the boys individually, along with Dave and myself. She even commented positively on our dog, Daisy. Seemed as if the home study would pass with flying colors. When Fran asked to look over the papers we had collected so far she frowned when she saw the adoption agency's name. Fran went on to explain that the dossier process, also known as the paper chase, can be daunting. She told us it would be easier to get through with help. Fran then asked us to consider meeting a friend of hers. Julia.

Dave and I went to an informal gathering at the downtown South Bend Library to meet Julia and hear about Great Wall China Adoption agency (GWCA). We were skeptical at the least to change agencies,but to date we had only paid an application fee. I felt if we were going to make a switch, now would be the time. However, there needed to be some kind of connection other than just Fran's recommendation. Julia was joyful and energetic, her positive attitude was contagious. When she handed me a folder with info about the programs offered at GWCA I was drawn to her business card tucked in the corner. There, typed on Julia's card was the same quote from the police station. The Chinese Proverb.

There is an invisible red thread
that connects those who are destined to meet
regardless of time, place or circumstance.
Although the thread may stretch or tangle,
~~~ it will never break. ~~~

Sunday, September 7, 2008

Our China Doll


Welcome to " Our China Doll" Journal


After more than 2 years of paperwork, stress, obstacles, and lengthening delays, we are on our way. On our way to Aubrey, who waits unaware that her life is about to change. At 3 years old we wonder how ready she will be for her journey around the world to a life full of hope and love, as part of a new family that will cherish her, to a place she can truly call home.


We will be flying into Beijing Sept. 14 at 9:30pm. Beijing and all of China will be celebrating the Autumn Lunar Festival - second only to the Chinese New Year. We may be greeted with fireworks and mooncakes, however after smashing through 11 time zones in 18 hours on an international flight, I doubt we will be in any shape for partaking in the festivities.


We will post nightly to show you all the wonders we see on our trip. The first leg will be sight seeing in Beijing. Tiannamen Square, The Forbidden City, The Summer Palace, and of course the Great Wall are a few of the places listed on our itinerary. After 3 days in Beijing we travel south to Guangdong province and the famous White Swan Hotel to await our meeting with Civil Affairs, and the reason for this whirlwind... Aubrey.


What we know about Aubrey:

She was found at 2 months of age on at gate No. 20 Shaxi Road, Shawan. She was fostered temporarily in Shawan before she was delivered to Shenzhen City's orphanage.

Her birthday was determined to be Aug. 2, 2005.

She is reported to be shy and quiet, but having a ready smile.

She is fond of reading books and listening to music.

Her report also states she is sometimes obstinate and impatient ( she will fit right in).

Her favorite things are being outdoors, eating fruit and playing with toy cars.

The name given to her is Shen JianHua.

JianHua literally translates to "Chinese Sword".

Her last name Shen translates to "difficult, or late".

(thanks to Yani for the translations - we were way off with our pin yin, thinking JianHua meant beautiful flower.)


We will be meeting Aubrey on Sept. 18 in Guangzhou. Please keep us in your prayers that we have a safe trip and the adoption process goes smoothly.



First Sign

All throughout this journey we have found ourselves being guided along the way. There has been so much synchronicity involved that it may seem a bit uncanny. I see in my mind the little old cement pylons, found all along Route 20 from Fremont to Toledo, each time we have another sign. With each sign the miles of distance left marked on the pylon grows smaller as we approach the end of this fascinating excursion.


Three years ago Dave asked me "If you could have anything in the world, what would it be?" My response was "you can't give me what I want most, but it would be a little girl".

It took another 6 months before Dave asked me this question "if you had a little girl, what would you name her?" I was on the computer at the time, I looked up and said "Aubrey". Dave looked shocked, then he asked "how did you come up with that name?" I told him "I read it in a book years ago, the little girl in the story was named Aubrey and I fell in love with her character." Dave then asked me to get up from the computer, he had something to show me. He pulled up his i-Tunes screen to show me a song he downloaded that morning. There it was, a little known song from the early seventies by the group Bread, titled "Aubrey".


I got chills as I listened to the words of this song for the first time. The lyrics that most caught my attention were "and I'd go a million times around the world just to say, she had been mine, for a day". Indeed, we will go around the world for her, but for life, not just a day.


We both took a deep breath and decided we were being given a push. This was the first sign of many along this serendipitous trek through the three stages of international adoption.